


Shattered

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, I Don't Even Know, I wanted to try my hand at angst, I'm Sorry, M/M, Mention of a gunshot, Nothing is graphic i swear, Please Don't Hate Me, Please be warned, Some mentions of blood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-05
Updated: 2016-02-05
Packaged: 2018-05-18 08:27:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5913634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account





	Shattered

Phil didn't know when everything went wrong. No, that wasn't right. He could remember the exact moment, the millisecond the world had shattered. Everything had been perfect. Phil couldn't remember being happier in his life. 

It had started out a normal evening in, tossing playful arguments between them over which superhero was better and why Phil was definitely Thor, even if Dan disagreed. The debate was never truly settled. It had just dissolved into other conversations, more important ones. Like what was for dinner and who was cooking. In the end both of them decided they were too lazy and went out to grab a quick bite. 

Dan affectionately called him “Space Boy” when he put on his favorite coat, warm brown eyes alight with mirth, a smirk on his lips that brought out his dimples. Phil laughed softly and pressed a soft kiss to his lips that developed into something a little deeper and distracting before they both remembered they were standing a little too close to the stairs, and Phil didn't exactly have the best coordination. 

A mandatory “fringe check” and they were out the door and walking along the busy streets of London. Not as busy as normal, considering they were out rather late. Phil wondered if part of the reason he tripped and stumbled so much was because he found it hard to take his eyes away from Dan. Probably.

They arrived at the restaurant, nothing too classy but not fast food either. Phil couldn't remember the name of it. Dinner was nice and relaxing. A quiet meal between the two of them. Dan let Phil tangle their legs, just a little bit, under the table, which was a testament to how relaxed Dan really was.

They had both eaten too much during dinner, though one could argue you could never eat too much food, so they decided to take a few laps around a park that was nearby. With all the walking it was more exercise than either of them got in a week probably. The park was small, and it was almost hidden away. Peaceful. Though the stars were mostly blocked out by the city of London Phil didn't need them. The only ones he could see were captured in a sea of warm brown. 

Phil didn't think the smile ever slid off Dan’s face while they were walking. They stopped at a small pond, the chilly night air nipping at their skin in a way that was somehow not cold. Phil reached out and grabbed Dan’s hand with the intentions of a quick squeeze, a way of saying I love you, but Dan’s hand tightened around his and held tight, unwilling to let go. Phil grinned at him, knowing how much it meant for his brunette to show any affection in public. One could never predict when a subscriber would pop up after all.

They decided they had gotten enough fresh air and started making their way back to their home, Dan returning his own hand back to his pocket with a soft smile in Phil's direction. Heart Eyes Howell, they called that look. The special look that was meant only for him. 

They were a little bit more than halfway home before the world collapsed.

A loud bang reverberated through the air, breaking through the normal that could be called quiet in a city. Somewhere a dog started barking, and it took a few minutes for Phil to recognize the sound. He turned to Dan, eyebrows drawn down in confusion. He looked panicked, eyes blown wide and pupils dilated. Phil opened his mouth to ask what was wrong, a deep panic setting itself in his chest, but before the question could slip out Dan schooled his face into a mask, a smile that didn't reach his eyes on his face. A smile Phil didn't like. 

Phil's concern only grew when Dan asked him how close he thought the nearest hospital was. Phil said Dan’s name, a question even as his voice rose in pitch and broke just a little bit. Dan pressed his hand to his chest, his ribcage. Not his heart.

“I think I may have been shot.”

Dan fell to his knees and Phil rushed forward to close the small amount of distance between them, supporting Dan’s weight. He sagged forward, hand still pressed tightly against his ribcage and all Phil could do was call Dan’s name, panic making his hands shake and voice break. Phil pressed a hand over Dan’s. Warmth seeped through, wet and sticky and definitely not right. Phil didn't doubt that if he were to pull his hand away and look at it it would be covered in bright red blood. 

Phil dialled the ambulance with his free hand, words too fast and broken and somewhere he was dimly aware he was sobbing and the polite lady was trying to get him to calm down. He wanted to be angry with her for being so calm when Dan, his Dan, was bleeding out on the pavement with skin going pale and breaths coming slower and slower. He couldn't though, not when he had done nothing wrong, and he forced himself to calm down just long enough to tell the lady where they were at. When she told them how long it would be, Phil didn't think that would be enough time. He knew it wouldn't be enough time. 

Dan tried to say something and ended up coughing blood, painting the pavement with proof he was dying. Proof Dan was not okay. Phil told him not to speak, gently pressed a kiss to his forehead after brushing aside his bangs despite how badly his hands were shaking and how badly he wanted to vomit from the feeling of panic repeatedly washing over him and drowning him. Wave after wave of suffocating panic that threatened to overtake him. Panic that would have overtaken him if he were not desperately trying to stop the blood from sleeping out of Dan. To prevent Dan from getting any paler and his breaths from getting any shallower because if that happened Dan would be dead, and Phil would be too.

Dan managed to get out something that sounded like an it's okay and Phil almost let out a broken laugh because it was anything but okay. It was the exact opposite of “okay.” The ambulance would not make it in time. Phil knew that as Dan’s breathing gradually slowed and his hand fell from his chest, the strength that he needed gone. Gone as his Dan was going to be, forever. Phil wanted be angry, to find whoever did this and take them down. Shake them until they promised they would fix it, would fix the bleeding hole in Dan. Phil could not find the strength. He clutched Dan’s body, too pale, too cold, to his chest and let his head drop. The energy was pulled out of him, and as Phil felt it leave he felt his soul start to unwind from his chest, sinking down into the ground with his energy. 

Dan pressed a hand to Phil’s cheek, and Phil clasped it, kissing his palm. Dan smiled softly at him, and for a moment everything was okay. Then Phil notices to differences. The flecks of crimson against Dan’s teeth, the labored breathing, the way his eyes were glazing over, losing focus. Phil’s heart wrenched with pain and he clung to his Dan, bent in half and sobbing. It was not beautiful. If was not poetic. There were no moments of clarity in the last moments. Phil felt confused, hurt, and lost. So very, very lost, and he didn't think he could ever find his way back through the shattered remains of his world. He didn't think he wanted to, not without Dan. 

Dan’s hand fell from his cheek and his breathing came to a shuddering stop. Phil froze, and for a moment everything was still. There was no noise but the pressing silence of death. Then Phil let out a sob, broken and battered and hopeless and empty and it made his throat hurt but he couldn't feel the physical pain through the torrents of loss. Phil rocked them back and forth, pressing his forehead against Dan’s tears sliding down his cheeks and onto Dan’s face. Phil pressed his lips to Dan’s, momentarily delirious as he thought that maybe if he kissed him Dan would come back, would jump up with a laugh and say how good he got Phil with a soft smile and a kiss to his nose. There were no such reactions, and Phil felt the last fragment of himself snap in half.


End file.
